The
Tastemaker has had Alexandra Stoddard in mind recently. I have read almost all of
her books so far (and am eager to read her latest, The Shared Wisdom of
Mothers and Daughters).
I read Living Beautifully
Together this week, and this paragraph spoke to me:
Think of your nurturing time as recess. Teachers have a snack. Soldiers marching get ten-minute breaks every hour so they can march farther. Union workers have coffee breaks. Ministers take time out to meditate, and go on retreats for renewal. You and I need a few regular breaks, too. Take them. Disappear and have a nap or a massage or a walk alone. Learn to feel comfortable with yourself when you escape. Alone, you find your center and feel better not only about yourself but everything else. You need time to think things through and listen to your own voice, because everyone else has something else in mind for you. You can’t react to others’ idea of who and what you are; you have to be authentically you.
Ms.
Stoddard is a steadfast proponent of leisure time. Whether it take the form of
a two-week vacation in Europe or a quiet half-hour to yourself in bed, taking
time for being – not doing – is essential for the good life.
Before
starting her own interior design firm, Ms. Stoddard worked for Eleanor McMillen Brown, one of the premier interior designers of the
mid-twentieth century. One of Mrs. Brown’s non-negotiable rules was that
business shut down at 5:30 in the afternoon. No exceptions. Ms. Stoddard
herself once got locked in the office building for working overtime and needed
to call the locksmith to get out.
I
don’t think that Ms. Stoddard would have been able to grant her special wisdom
to her readers – teaching us about taste and beauty and kindness and yes,
leisure – if she had been trapped in the office for 80 (or more) hours a week.
What
kind of job does not allow you to make significant progress in no more than
eight hours a day, 40 per week?
I
do love writing and designing, but I cannot do it for cruelly long periods of
time. I would burn out. I would lose the care and concern for craft that I need
to do my best.
Being
tasteful means having not only the means to explore the beauty of the world,
but the time as well. An afternoon tea in the garden, complete with dainty
sandwiches (and, perhaps, petits-fours from Surfas) can do more for your
creativity than a canned “motivational” meeting under fluorescent lights,
fueled with fast food.
“Nothing excellent can
be done without leisure.” – André Gide
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